Peanuts from Heaven

We're happy to keep guiding you through the strange but true events of the Twins 2013 season
*Note: Events are not actually true, but would be very entertaining if they were.

Here's our second edition of Twins recaps as only we can do them: inaccurately but chock full of puns and bad jokes!

Game 4

Orioles 9-Twins 5

...

Tags: aaron hicks, chris parmelee, wha happened?

Categories

Uncategorized

Growing up, there were three songs that would invariably draw my entire family in to the tv room: "One Shining Moment", "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" and "The James Bond Theme". Last Friday (after Chris Davis crushed the hopes of Twins fans with a game-winning grand slam), I watched a James Bond documentary (Everything or Nothing available on Netflix streaming) to cheer myself up.


...

Tags: batting order, glen perkins, joe mauer, relief pitching

Categories

Uncategorized

In an effort to keep my blogging on a more consistent time-line, I have decided that rather than writing when the mood strikes me (or when I sigh dispiritedly at my inactivity), I will try to post short recaps of each series after they wrap up--this way I have a regular time to write and a consistent subject to write about.

Of course, while lots of people will tell you what happened, only we Peanuts can tell you what happened...in our imagination!

Game 1
Tigers 4-Twins

...

Tags: chris parmelee, joe mauer, justin morneau, kevin correia, wha happened?

Categories

Uncategorized

Like everything else I write: this is also available at our original site: Peanuts from Heaven

It's a spring-time tradition. When Spring Break arrives, I say goodbye to my students, make a few Arrested Development jokes with my colleagues, and pick up as much as I can find on the impending baseball season



This year, in addition to the standard season preview issues of Sports Illustrated and ESPN, I also picked up the City Pages, on the basis of it's ominous ...

Tags: baseball economics, competitive balance, moneyball, parity

Categories

Uncategorized

Welcome to Opening Day! Before we begin we have a SUPER SPECIAL NEW FEATURE!!! If you don't know who to cheer for, we can help with that. Just check out a link to our "Find your Favorite" Feature and answer a few questions to help match you with a current Twin.


We should also welcome the latest addition to our Peanuts From Heaven Hall of Fame: Jim Thome!

...

Tags: hall of fame, predictions, season preview

Categories

Uncategorized

It's our final Get To Know 'Em post this Spring and we're delighted to send it off in style with two rising talents in the Twins ranks. (And for those who have hated these posts, don't worry...they're done...for now)

Meet Chris Parmelee! (Right Fielder/First Baseman)

...

Tags: chris parmelee, liam hendriks, our minnesota twins, scott boras

Categories

Uncategorized

As we near the end of our introduction to the new and improved Minnesota Twins we consider a few players who might not be around as much as we in the "let's-have-fun-and-laugh-a-little-at-the-Twins" crowd might like.

Meet Jamey Carroll! (Infielder)

Player's Background: Jamey Carroll is many things, a scrappy infielder (hey, where have we heard that before?), a clubhouse leader, the last surviving Expo. Above all he is a journeyman utility player who can (and does) play ...

Tags: jamey carroll, our minnesota twins, samuel deduno

Categories

Uncategorized

The Twins season begins in less than 1 week! And yet there are still more players to meet as we continue to get to know our versions of the major league roster.

Meet Brian Dozier! (Second Baseman/Infielder)

Player's Background: A small, scrappy infielder out of Mississippi, Brian Dozier earned the attention of Twin scouts at the University of Southern Mississippi (presumably because the same year he was drafted Brett Favre [another Southern Miss grad] was working ...

Tags: brian dozier, mike pelfrey, our minnesota twins, scott boras

Categories

Uncategorized

It's your last chance to cruise over to our original site and vote for the PFH Hall of Fame: honoring the funnest Twins players in the history of our blogging.

We're a week into getting to know OUR versions of the Minnesota Twins. And while there's plenty to cheer for already, there are others we have yet to meet...so here we go!

Meet Trevor Plouffe! (Third Baseman/Infielder)

Player's Background: Drafted in 2004, Plouffe's rise to prominence has been ...

Tags: kevin correia, our minnesota twins, scapegoat, trevor plouffe

Categories

Uncategorized

As always this post can be seen in it's more easily formatted glory at our original site (where you can vote for a Twins player to go into our "Hall of Fame"...which given the calibre of my writing is a rather dubious honor)

It's time continue our introductions to this year's Minnesota Twins...if you're just joining us: we're here to answer that increasingly common question on Twins' fans (chapped) lips: "who the heck is that guy?" And we'll do it in the most Minnesotan ...

Tags: darin mastoianni, our minnesota twins, vance worley, vanimal

Categories

Uncategorized

Continuing our series that aims to answer the question "who the heck is that guy?" [both here and on our other blog]: we're here to tell you about prominent Twins, and we'll do it in the most Minnesotan way we know how: by providing you facts (player's background), fiction (the alternate background we used to dream up the photoshop), fandom (ways to cheer for them) and flattery (less positive cheers, aka Minnesota "Nice" comments)


Let's get started!
...

Tags: brian duensing, our minnesota twins, ryan doumit

Categories

Uncategorized

This is the start of a new series available at Peanuts from Heaven! and our partnered site at Twins Daily.


While many of the people who check out this website are serious seam-heads, committed to knowing the depth charts from Minnesota through Elizabethton, not everyone knows that much...so in an effort to get new fans committed we offer a quirkier look at the local 9. These are not "your Minnesota Twins," they aren't the guys who run out on to the field to the strains ...

Tags: glen perkins, joe nathan, josh willingham, our minnesota twins

Categories

Uncategorized

I know you love the Twins brother, it's just...--My little brother, January 2013.


For her birthday, I took Stinky, aka Mrs. Peanut, aka the co-founder of this blog, aka my wife, to Chicago to see her sister and a whole pile of friends. We had a great time, trying great restaurants, escaping "bro-bars" and celebrating the fact that she has continued to cheat death for another year.
My wife's sister lives about a mile down the road from Wrigley Field, and even an ...

Tags: optimist, pessimist, realist, we love it

Categories

Uncategorized

You can vote for the "Hall of Fame" discussed in this blog (and see this post with all kinds of other goofy photoshops) on our main blogger page.

After the debacle of the Hall of Fame's "non-election" and last weekend's Academy Awards, there is but one honor left to bestow before the baseball season begins: the Peanuts From Heaven Hall of Fame! Yes, we still offer induction to all those who make the game fun to watch (even if they weren't exactly "good" ...

Tags: former minnesota twins, we love it

Categories

Uncategorized