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  • Swing's the Thing: Twins - Mariners Recap

    No Big Deal (SEA 3, MIN 0)

    The ball game was relegated to nothing more than background noise. The goose-egg on the Twinsí side of the scoreboard did little to lure me back in.

    With baseball refusing to signal the beginning of weekend joy. My conversation with my friend turned to ghost stories and hard luck tales. I even dug out the flashlight for that special campfire vibe.

    And so itís like this: Baseball is apple pie, and when people are done with their slice they return to sampling the evils of the regular world.

    What Iím saying is Minnesota baseballís piece of pie better get a lot more satisfying if it plans to be pleasantly distracting this summer.

    3-0 ainít cutting it.

    Selling the Drama (MIN 5, SEA 4)

    When Doumit hit the walk-off triple and I pumped my fist inside my car, I knew it was time to stop being superstitious about jinxing him. I touched the Misfits button I have on my driverís side visor and heard, in my mind, the opening bars of ďMother.Ē

    Thinking of a certain relief pitcher as your closer may not make for good managing, but it does create guaranteed drama on the diamond. If you create a guy as the end-all-be-all of keeping the other team of the scoreboard, you create at least three guys who want to take him down.

    Gotta love that.

    Gotta love Joe Mauer, too. Heís confident, calm, and consistent. I get a mouth full of bile any time I hear someone complain about whether or not heís clutch. They sound like someone screaming ďTold you itíd be headsĒ after the coin didnít come up tails for the first time in a hundred tries.

    Raining Domination and Baseballs (MIN 10, SEA 0)

    This is going to sound counter-intuitive, but the best way to appreciate a home team blowout is in bits and pieces, scattered through out your day.

    Donít misunderstand me Ė nothing beats being at the game. But if you canít be at the game, itís best to get the game in glimpses. That way, every time you tune in the Twins smash it up and pour on some runs.

    When Iím not hearing the game, Iím imagining the Twins have somehow perfected batting to the point where they CANNOT miss, and they CANNOT hit anything except a home run.

    The scoreboard would read infinity.

    Major league baseball would be forced to enact what would be referred to as the Twins Rules.

    Joe Mauer would live on a mountain of baseballs and meditate in his own strike zone of Zen.

    10-0 is pretty good, though.

    But someday.
    This article was originally published in blog: Swing's the Thing: Twins versus Mariners (Games 51-53) started by Mr. Horrorpants
    Comments 4 Comments
    1. 70charger's Avatar
      70charger -
      Good stuff. I would read more recaps like this.
    1. Riverbrian's Avatar
      Riverbrian -
      #1... Anything written by someone called Mr. Horrorpants immediately gets my attention.
      #2... After reading it... You lived up to the standard of someone called Mr. Horrorpants.
      #3.... That's a good thing... Full compliments to you... Very entertaining... More please!!!
    1. John Bonnes's Avatar
      John Bonnes -
      Quote Originally Posted by 70charger View Post
      Good stuff. I would read more recaps like this.
      I agree. Sorry it took me so long to promote it.
    1. Brad Swanson's Avatar
      Brad Swanson -
      I enjoy these summaries as well. I strongly agree with your bits and pieces philosophy when it comes to blowouts.
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